


Golden eye

by VelourFanClub (toomanysorrows)



Category: Fire Emblem: If | Fire Emblem: Fates
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, But Nothing Too Bad, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Slight Mentions of Gore, They all appear but I tagged in order of importance, Werewolf AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-21
Updated: 2018-10-21
Packaged: 2019-08-05 10:41:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,091
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16366319
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/toomanysorrows/pseuds/VelourFanClub
Summary: When Camilla is twelve and on a royal hunt, she gets bitten by a large black wolf. Her life is never the same after.





	Golden eye

**Author's Note:**

> Okay I am pretty sure this is the longest fic I've ever written that wasn't multichapter xD
> 
> But yeah, basically just an au where Camilla is a werewolf. Important: wolfskin and werewolves are different things in this au. Werewolves are a magic curse, wolfskin just another species.
> 
> Thanks to Cowboy_Sneep_Dip for proofreading!!

The royal hunt was one of the biggest and oldest annual events at the royal castle. Originally, it was highly symbolic. While Nohr wasn’t quite the land full of youkai that the Hoshidans spoke of in their stories, it was still a dark, untamed place, with many horrors hiding in the shadows. In the hunt the king and his vassals would ride out, hunting down one of these creatures to symbolise their protection of the people against the things that lurked in the darkness. 

Back when the tradition was first started, it was much more dangerous, with at least one fatality each year, but in recent times it had become a much calmer affair. As human civilization had slowly expanded, there were less places for abominations to lurk, and as the nobles and the king made a profit from the trade in magical ingredients that could only be found in Nohr, they were able to raise standing armies to guard against these creatures. They were still out there of course, but fighting them was much less of a concern than it had been in the early days of the kingdom. The royal forest rarely had anything bigger than deer or the occasional boar nowadays, and often foreign creatures would be imported and let loose to make things more interesting. It was more of a social event now, where young knights could impress their loves, where nobles could chat about the latest fashion in Cyrkensia and discuss marriage alliances and where young heirs could make their first appearance at the court.

That year, it was decided Camilla could go along. She was only twelve, but had already shown promise in her sparring lessons, and with all the guards around no one thought twice about taking her along to the hunt. Her father even gave her a new set of armour, thick with precious metal but maybe too form-fitting for her comfort, and a large, ornate silver spear. She had looked forward to it, truthfully. She wasn’t one for court events, where she was only shown off as a piece of meat by her father, but she’d heard enough stories about the hunt over the years that she had been thrilled to partake. If she did her best, she hoped she might even land the killing blow on a deer (not a rabbit of course. Elise loved bunnies and would probably not speak to her for a week if she ever found out Camilla had killed one.)

No one had thought anything would go wrong, and for a while, nothing did. The party made slow progress through the trees, only illuminated by the faint light of a full moon, chatting happily. In fact, so little happened that Camilla and some of the other young nobles separated from the main group, in search of something more exciting.

When next the main party found her, she was slumped against a tree, her left eye having been clawed out and with a nasty bite-wound on her shoulder that had somehow pierced her armour, while a hulking black wolf lay on the ground, her spear through its neck.

She was rushed to a healer, who quickly used his stave to make sure only scar tissue remained over her wounds (unfortunately there were not a lot of healers skilled enough to grow back an eye). No one thought much more of it after that. Camilla had already started brushing her hair to cover up the ugly scar the next day. While Garon was somewhat displeased that his daughters appearance had been disfigured like that, he had gotten several compliments about his daughters prowess in taking down such a beast alone, so he let the matter rest. Even Camilla didn’t think much of it. Sure, she sometimes had nightmares about it, but as far as she was concerned it was just another trauma to deal with, and hardly the biggest one she had.

Then a maid was found dead, her throat torn open, and Camilla woke up with blood all around her mouth and on her clothes, her remaining eye glowing a bright gold.

Scholars were called in. A glamour was cast on her eye to make it appear its normal purple again. The royal houndmaster was fired and exiled for having left the cage of the mastiffs open. No one spoke of it again. After all, as Garons beautiful and talented daughter, nothing could be allowed to tarnish her reputation as the perfect princess.

She was given a black potion, made by the royal alchemist after several days of looking over old tomes. Its taste was horrible, its effects even worse. Every full moon she writhed in agony in her bed as her bones were violently kept from rearranging themselves and the beast in her tried desperately to get out and hunt.

Eventually, one of the scholars at court suggested that forcing her to keep the wolf in might have long term ill-effects. Her father wasn’t pleased, but Camilla was already too valuable a pawn for him to let her get ruined by a curse. At the edge of the Crown Lands, a large wall with an iron gate was built around a lake surrounded by woods. She still had to take the potion, but every third full moon, she was allowed to go to the enclosure instead and run free. To anyone asking, it was just said that it was a private spa, another one of the princess’s eccentricities that her father had graciously agreed to indulge.

They always released some rabbits for her to hunt. Camilla knew that if Elise ever found out, explaining the dead bunnies would be the least hard part.

\----

When she told Beruka about her… condition, shortly after hiring her, the former assassin wasn’t fazed. Having lived as a street rat and an assassin, she had seen stranger things. Calling the nobility wolves was something she’d heard a lot growing up, but Beruka wisely didn’t mention that. She may have had the social skills of a dead ferret, as her master had once told her, but even she knew that that was the last thing the princess needed to hear at that moment. So when the second full moon after she entered princess Camilla’s service came, she obediently escorted her to the enclosure, and stood guard by her carriage as the gates were shut.

Beruka’s presence, even outside of the walls of the enclosure, somehow made Camilla feel safer. Before, she’d only been accompanied by some of her father’s personal guards. It always made her feel like a prisoner, a monster to be guarded. With the guards swapped for Beruka, she felt more free. Beruka was… maybe not a friend, but at least her retainer. An ally. Someone she could trust to not freak out at the barest glimpse of her wilder form and try to attack her.

Still, she ordered Beruka to always carry an axe of silver and to sleep in her room on every full moon where she didn’t go to the enclosure. If the potion ever stopped working, she knew Beruka could take care of her. That’s why she’d hired an assassin as her retainer after all.

\----

Camilla always doted on Corrin a little bit more than on her other siblings. It wasn’t a matter of preference, she loved them all equally and would die for all of them without a second thought. But after spending so many nights a prisoner in the enclosure or in her own body, she knew all too well what it must feel like for the girl in the far-away tower. So she did her best to spend time with Corrin when she could, bringing Elise with her when possible (since the only thing better than taking care of one of her siblings was taking care of two of them at once). So she kept them company, helping them with their etiquette lessons, playing games and of course teasing them. And when she read them a bedtime story (which Corrin always insisted she was too old for, but Camilla knew she secretly still loved them) she skipped the parts about the big bad wolf.

\----

A scholar proposed to her father that a beaststone could help her. Her father agreed, and the man was sent to observe her the next full moon at the enclosure, while she had the beaststone tied around her neck.

The man’s family received a letter saying that there had been an unfortunate accident with a mastiff escaping while he was out on a walk.

\----

Camilla was sixteen when she saw combat for the first time.

It was something small. Her father had decided she was old enough to command a small body of troops, and she had been sent out with her troops to put down a group of bandits that were making the roads unsafe on one of the trade routes with Nestra.

At first she’d intended to be quick and clean about it. Offer parlay first, then attack if refused. Kill their leader and officers, and take the rest prisoner to deliver them to justice. But when she went in to fight the bandit chief, a hulking brute of a woman with an axe three times as big as her sword, she heard the wolf howl inside her. Her vision went red and soon, she was standing amidst the corpses of the bandits, panting as she leaned on the axe which she had somehow grabbed from the bandit chief. Her soldiers looked at her with a mix of awe and fear.

She started using an axe afterwards, finding its use much more satisfying than a sword.

Soon, she was one of her father’s most active agents, hunting down rebels, bandits, monsters or anyone else her father wants throughout the kingdom. People started calling her king Garon’s bloodhound, and she couldn’t help but grimace when she thought about how accurate that really was.

The full moons where she couldn’t shift started to hurt less. She had become somewhat used to the pain, but the wolf also seemed to be trying less hard to get out, seemingly satisfied with all the blood she regularly drew now. She wasn’t sure whether the decrease in physical pain was worth the emotional pain of the things people whispered behind her back.

\----

Selena took the information less well than Beruka did and Camilla couldn’t blame her. On the nights where she left for the enclosure, only Beruka went with her, leaving Selena to have a night off or deal with some other task. The couple of times that the subject was brought up around the girl, she would stare off into the distance for a moment, as if thinking about something. Camilla wondered if she had experience with this sort of inner darkness.

One full moon however, when Selena was supposed to have a night off, she joined Camilla and Beruka outside. Selena and Beruka just exchanged a glance and nodded at each other, and the carriage left in silence.

Camilla could feel Selena watching her through the bars of the iron gate as she shifted, and she was glad the girl was still there in the morning, and the day afterwards.

\----

When they had all returned to the castle the day after Corrin abandoned them on the plains of Hoshido, Camilla left for the enclosure straight away, not even bothering to change. Her retainers followed, clearly worried but silent. As soon as she arrived she threw off her armour and didn’t emerge again for three days. Peasants in the area still tell folktales about the heart-breaking howls that were heard day and night during those days. When she finally stumbled through the gate again, her body was covered in dirt and scratches, with blood running from her nails (her own blood for once) and almost fainting. 

Selena caught her quickly, and she felt grateful to feel her retainer’s strong arms around her. She didn’t quite hear what they said to each other, but Beruka hurried off as Selena set her down by the fire they had going, putting a blanket around Camilla’s shoulders. Selena took her hands, bandaging the wounds around her nails and somewhere in the process Camilla fell asleep. She was awoken by an unusually apologetic Selena, telling her they had some food ready and that she really should eat. Camilla blinked the sleep away from her eyes and looked over to the fire where a pheasant and two rabbits were roasting, tended to by Beruka. Something in the smell set her off, and she devoured the dead animals quickly with a shocking disregard for table manners. She was about to apologise to the two of them but they just smiled, clearly somewhat amused. They just told her that it was probably time to head home, and so they did.

Corrin’s departure still stung, but somehow, it hurt less than before.

\----

She was happy to be in Corrin’s army, but it was also a worrying situation. She was away from the rest of her family, and while she knew that what they were doing was the only way to keep them all safe, the distance still stung. But back when she left to capture Corrin and take her back, she had thought she would be back before the full moon, so she hadn’t taken any of the potions with her. And just running free wasn’t an option. As she walked through the fortress at night, she did her best to think of a solution. Just finding a forest outside of the astral realm didn’t seem like a good idea. She already had the blood of two innocents on her hands, she did not want to think about adding a third by accident. They had a smithy, perhaps they could somehow fashion some kind of cage…

She had been so lost in thought that she hadn’t noticed Corrin walking towards her until they both bumped into each other. Corrin apologised profusely (of course she did) but Camilla just laughed it away, telling her it was fine. She was used to her younger sister’s clumsiness after all. Corrin laughed along awkwardly, but Camilla could see something was wrong with the girl, and being the concerned older sister she was, she of course asked. Corrin had hesitated for a moment, before she started talking, and eventually ended up sobbing in Camilla’s chest. As she hugged Corrin close, she listened to the story. How Corrin found her mother and killed her while a dragon. How she still felt guilty about it despite Azura’s and Sakura’s assurances she was not to blame. How, despite having a dragonstone, she was still terrified at the thought of it happening again.

It was the first time Camilla saw any positive side to her condition. After all, it allowed her to understand Corrin’s situation perfectly, and to comfort her better. She told Corrin about her own situation, the first time she’d ever done so to a family member, and told Corrin about how she wasn’t a monster. How she wasn’t responsible for anything she did in such a form. How it didn’t make her a bad person.

It helped Corrin, and it wasn’t long before she headed back to bed after having given Camilla one last hug.

Camilla wished she could believe what she had told Corrin.

\----

The problem was solved. The day after her emotional talk with Corrin, the girl took Camilla to see Lilith. That was how they found out there was a deeprealm, not far from the castle and without a large discrepancy in the passage of time. It was almost entirely composed of lush forest, with not a person around. Perfect for Camilla to go and let her wolf out.

Camilla left for the deeprealm the next full moon. Beruka and Selena went with her to the portal, where they gathered her clothes, but they didn’t join her in the deeprealm itself. It would have been far too dangerous in Camilla’s eyes. But when Camilla emerged tired the next morning, Beruka was there to help her back to the barracks, where Selena was already brewing tea.

Being able to let the wolf out every month, and to really run free without having to worry about killing someone or being killed, helped Camilla tremendously. She found that over time, her periods as a wolf grew less dark. Normally she only remembered vague flashes, but now she could often remember most of what she did, and over time she started retaining some control over her actions while in wolf form. She still had her instincts of course, they still guided most of what she did, but it didn’t feel like she was just stuck in the body anymore, helpless while it moved on its own.

The same change was true outside of the full moon too. No red haze covered her eyes when in battle anymore. The bloodlust and the instincts were still there, but for the first time they felt more like an asset rather than something that controlled her. She no longer felt the uncontrollable desire to chase down the enemy until they were all dead. Instead, she found that more and more she could pull on the reins when necessary, making her inner wolf help her fight only when she chose to. She was still a force to be reckoned with, still a figure that struck fear in the hearts of the soldiers. But the tales of her wiping out entire regiments without letting anyone live lessened in quantity.

\----

The Hoshidan princess was suspicious of her.

Camilla saw how the woman subtly observed her during the daily events around the fortress, and especially while doing battle with Nohrian soldiers. She was surprisingly good at it, Camilla almost wouldn’t have noticed if it wasn’t for the wolf within her always growing anxious from feeling watched. Camilla didn’t think much of it. She knew the princess held no love for Nohrians, and especially not for her as Corrin’s adoptive older sister. As far as Camilla was concerned, the princess could be suspicious all she wanted. Camilla wouldn’t give her a reason to badmouth her.

She hadn’t expected the Hoshidan princess and her retainers, as well those ninjas her older brother employed, to all be waiting for her and Beruka after they returned from the deeprealm at the next full moon.

Angrily, she accused Camilla of giving information to Garon’s troops, and Camilla could already hear Beruka inconspicuously unsheathing a knife next to her. The Hoshidans didn’t have their weapons drawn or pointed, but she could see their hands resting on the grips of their daggers or clasped around the wood of their larger weapons. Despite all of her instincts telling her to run, she managed to explain the situation calmly. When the princess stated she didn’t believe any of it, Camilla removed the glamour from her eye, to let a golden wolf’s eye look at the party. The Hoshidan priest whispered something in the princess’s ear, and she reluctantly nodded after a moment of thinking. She mumbled some quiet apologies and left with her warriors. Camilla let out a sigh she didn’t know she had been holding, and she and Beruka quickly headed back to the barracks.

Princess Hinoka apologised the next day for her suspicion, and for putting Camilla on the spot like that, and her awkwardness while doing it was too cute for Camilla to not forgive her.

\----

After the incident, Camilla decided it was better to inform the rest of her family of her condition before any more awkward situations like this could arise. The conversation was tense and rather stressfull for Camilla, but the reactions gave her hope. Leo said he already had a suspicion, which didn’t surprise Camilla. He had always been so clever after all. As expected, Elise made her promise not to eat any bunnies, and Camilla promised (Elise didn’t say anything about deer or chipmunks after all). Still, the girl gave her a big hug and told her she’d always be her big sister, and it was all Camilla could do to keep from crying. Azura was there too, since she was Camilla’ sister too, even if they’d only just really met each other. The girl just smiled and nodded mysteriously, like she seemed to be so fond of doing, and told Camilla that she’d seen weirder. She gave Corrin a nudge and a wink, causing the manakete to roll her eyes. She also promised to relay the information to the Hoshidan royalty at Camilla’s request. Camilla had figured it would be best for them to know too, but wasn’t particularly excited about the idea of telling them herself, and it didn’t seem like princess Hinoka was the kind of woman who’d tell everyone secrets like hers. 

The knowledge soon spread around camp, preventing any future awkward situations like with princess Hinoka. She found surprisingly little people seemed to care about it. She supposed that a werewolf in an army with a manakete, two wolfskin and two kitsune wasn’t particularly remarkable. The closest thing to any reaction about it she got was an over-enthusiastic Selkie making her promise they could hunt together some time (much to the nearby Elise and Sakura’s dismay).

She didn’t apply the glamour on her eye again.

\----

Paradoxically enough, at the end of the battle with Anankos, Camilla felt better than ever. She was drenched in sweat, her armour was beaten up, and she had several wounds that definitely needed a healer, but the adrenaline coursed through her as she leaned on her axe. It was a strikingly similar situation to that first fight with the bandit leader, when she’d first handled an axe, but this felt so much better. They had won. They had actually won! The damned war was over! Caught up in the joy of the moment, she let control slip for a bit, and let out a loud, triumphant howl. It broke the tension hanging in the air, and suddenly everyone on the platform started laughing, more out of relief and happiness than because of any comedy. It would still be a lot of work to rebuild everything that had been broken thanks to Anankos’ influence, but the hardest part was over, and there was nothing they couldn’t do now.

\----

After the war, and after the rebuilding effort had gotten under way, Camilla relinquished her status as a princess. The war had given her a lot to think about, and she realised that the last thing she wanted was for the rest of her life to just be more court politics, or even to be in castle Krakenburg much more. As she was still a noble, Xander granted her the title of duchess and a small duchy close to the border with Nestra. It was not a very densely populated area, close to mount Garou too, so governing it wouldn’t be too much hard work and there was plenty of forest for Camilla to run wild and let out her monthly urges. It was also close enough to the border that visits to Cyrkensia could happen regularly.

She settled down there with Beruka (Selena had left already to her mysterious homeland, but luckily not without a goodbye). Officially Beruka was still Camilla’s retainer for a while, but it wasn’t too long before they got married, and of course they adopted children. They sometimes asked where their mommy went at night, and why there was loud howling in the forest each month, but Beruka just explained that that was their mommy talking about things with the nearby wolfskin. They knew Wolfskin weren’t dangerous thanks to their cousin Velouria who sometimes visited (apparently Camilla’s estate had some very special pine cones), so it never took long for them to return to their colouring books or dolls. Sometimes though, Beruka could find one of them looking into the forest through the windows, having snuck out of bed to listen to the howling. 

Of course, it wasn’t all perfect. Camilla still couldn’t really visit Hoshido without hearing whispers of Garon’s bloodhound, despite her now close friendship with princess Hinoka. Her fear of herself would never go away entirely, and she still made Beruka carry the silver axe when practical, just in case. And sometimes she still woke up from nightmares full of blood and fur. But overall, her life had turned out much better than what she could have imagined after the first full moon where she changed, and she was thankful for that.


End file.
